I am a forgiver
because 
I’ve been forgiven.

My filth and my failures
filled up 
every page of
every book on 
every shelf
of the world’s largest library.
Expansive, unedited,
detailed and damning,
with new volumes 
added every day—
my crimes, 
no matter how 
masqueraded 
or modest,
sentenced me to death 
for all 
e t e r n i t y.

And yet, 
He came in compassion,
set fire to my 
colossal collection,
burned
to
the
ground 
every last page of
every last book on
every last shelf 
and said,
“It is finished. 
You’re forgiven.
Oh, how I love you!”

(Selah)

So, yes, it’s true—
your crimes
have crushed my heart;
you’ve pierced 
me through. 
You’ve bullied His bride
then balked at her bleeding—
cast her aside
and called it a win.
How can you love the Head
yet hate His body?

But have I
not done as much…
and more?
When I think on
my salacious sins—
that library of guilt—
your sins against me
fit on 

one
small
page.

Why then do I wrestle 
to strike this 
match of mercy
and burn to ashes 
your one-page wrongs?—
wrongs that He
entrusted to me,
that I might know Him more
and make much of His love.

Beloved—
on that Day
when at last we see 
His face,
behold His beauty,
bask in grace—
we’ll forever forget
this brief brokenness.
It will be 
swallowed up 
in perfect love
for one another.
And with that hope
held fast in my heart,
I choose again today
to live a life of love—
to freely forgive…
as I myself have been 
forgiven.

—Colleen Chao